Rebuttal 2.2

Mark Melchior

Eleanor Henderson

Academic Writing

February 27, 2011

Why Chinese Mothers Are Just As Good As Any Mother

            The Wall Street Journal recently published an article titled “Why Chinese Mothers are superior.” The story, written by Yale Law Professor Amy Chua, is an excerpt from her book Battle Hymn of The Tiger Mother. Throughout the article she presents a very elementary analysis between the parenting skills of “Chinese” parents versus “Western” parents. By the end of the piece Professor Chua has presented an argument that lacks any sufficient evidence, and condemns and insults the western society she is currently a part of. Cultural backgrounds are no means of deciding who has a better, more successful parenting style.

            To begin, Chua attempts to support her claim by using some evidence. This evidence, however, provides almost no convincing properties, as they are mostly only her personal experiences with her children. She references a study in the fourth paragraph, “In one study of 50 Western American mothers and 48 Chinese immigrant mothers, almost 70% of Western mothers said either that “stressing academic success is not good for children” or that “parents need to foster the idea that learning is fun,” (Chua, par. 4). I’m not exactly a mathematician, but I hardly agree that the opinions of 35 American women account for all of Western society. These types of bogus examinations occur throughout Chua’s article without citing any type of reliable source. She goes on to say that not one of the Chinese mothers agreed with the Americans. As with the Americans, I would say that 48 Chinese women barely account for the entire nation of China. Another example Chua uses is when she says, “Chinese parents spend approximately 10 times as long every day drilling academic activities with their children…Western kids are more likely to participate in sports teams,” (Chua, par. 4). The National Council on Family Relations published a study that concluded that parents from different ethnic backgrounds are actually quite similar. Chinese and Caucasian, in this case the Western, parents both placed a high importance on their child’s school performance, following family rules, and carrying out responsibilities on their own. It also indicated that there was an emphasis on parents urging their kids to be kind and considerate (Julian, McKenry, Mckelvey 34). It would appear that as far as priorities, parents of all backgrounds tend to lean in similar directions. The data shows that almost all parents desire and ask the same qualities of their children. The method used to achieve that obedience is often much different.

            Most psychologists tend to agree that there are basically three types of parenting styles: permissive, authoritative, and authoritarian. Amy Chua is the definition of authoritarian parenting. It is categorized by the parent’s total domination of the child’s preferences, and also includes making decisions for the kids, along with commanding them to perform in a certain way. For the militant Amy Chua, this meant her girls were never allowed to, “have friends over, have a sleepover, not play piano or violin, choose their own extracurricular activities,” (Chua, par. 1). In addition, she also believes, “it is crucial to override their preferences…interrogating and spying…override all of their children’s own desires and preferences,” (Chua, par. 5, 14, 16). If you spend your life aggravated, and focused on everything your child does it will breed an adult that cannot see responsibility or make decisions for themselves. It is good to guide kids as they grow so they make the right decisions. However, it is detrimental to a person’s psyche if they are never taught key lessons like what is right versus what is wrong, how to communicate with others, and how to make an educated and informed decision. In the first issue of the Journal of Education and Human Development, from Louisiana Tech University, several psychologists conducted an analysis of parenting styles. They describe the effects of each technique, and for authoritarian they listed qualities of authoritarian children, “may be rearing children to believe that they are not responsible for what happens to them…have poorer social skills, lower self-esteem, and higher levels of depression…tend to rear girls who are less independent, boys who are more aggressive, and children who appear discontent…more extrinsically motivated,” (Marsiglia, Walcyzk, Buboltz, Griffith-Ross, 5). Of course this research does not apply to every single authoritarian family, and it’s important to note that the majority still suffers from these conditions.

            The Chinese have a very rich, cultured history that goes much further back than any American history textbook. They believe in traditions of strength, honor, and family. It’s important to realize that the values of a culture are passed through generations. This clearly is the case with Mrs. Chua. She is not a bad parent by any means for conducting her children in the authoritarian manner. Everyone is entitled to raise a child as they see fit. These cultural standards were held with great significance in her family, and they are still significant to her. Throughout her article, she presents several personal experiences to assert that dominance is the best policy. Unfortunately, the evidence she uses to state how superior she is falls short. Chua fails to define the difference between a good parent and a bad parent. The reality is that her cultural background has nothing to do with her success as a parent. I come from an Irish-Italian family and believe that my heritage has little to do with how I was raised.

            Mrs. Chua uses experiences as a mother to try and hold some strength in her argument. I cannot exactly combat in the same way seeing as I am not a mother, nor will I ever be. However, I have had experiences with my parents that offer similar results, through less intrusive parenting. For example, Chua cites an instance where her daughter could not learn a song on the piano. So, Chua decided to descend upon her daughter, forcing the music and attacking her saying that her sister could play it at that age. They went for hours back and forth, fighting the whole time, until finally she was able to play the piece (Chua, par. 17-24). In another instance, Chua called one of her girls “garbage” in an attempt to motivate her (Chua, par. 7).

            In my family, my parents utilized more authoritative style. This style consists of a blend of demands and expectations. Parents explain things rationally, but do not leave enough room for a child to make an argument. It is a rational-based approach to teaching kids to be responsible and altruistic (Marsiglia, Walczyk, Buboltz, Griffith-Ross 7). For example, when my brother was in middle school he was having trouble with times tables. So, my father coached him constantly, much like Mrs. Chua had done with her daughter on the piano. When my brother finally started succeeding my parents backed off and allowed him to grow, and develop good academic practices. If he stumbled they would help enough to get him on track again. Never did my parents force us to do an activity, or shut down our voice. They stressed communication, emotion, and independence. Now years later, my three siblings and I are all in higher education, with completely different interests. My sister Jenny is a working nurse with a job offer and generous salary. My other sister April is finishing art school, and my brother Eric is in his first year at medical school. He is also contracted with the United States Air Force. I am now a communications student, working on television shows and also a DJ at school. All of this success came more from expectations and natural motivation rather than enforcement.

            Amy Chua’s argument in “Why Chinese Mothers Are Superior” presents an interesting look at a particular parenting style. She says it’s important for total domination of children otherwise things will go awry. However, her argument never truly cites any sufficient evidence to support that this is the best way to raise a child. Furthermore she fails to convince the audience that a Chinese mother is better than anything else. In fact, most parents are on the same level. Through professional studies we can see that the majority of parents want the same things for their child. We also see that extreme styles of parenting, such as authoritarian, do not always work. The same success can be accomplished through trust, guidance and affection. It does not matter whether they are Black, White, Chinese, or Hispanic. Good parents are ones that show unconditional love and support for their children.

Works Cited

Chua, Amy. “Why Chinese Mothers are Superior.” Online.wsj.com.

            8 January 2011. The Wall Street Journal. Web. 18 February 2011.

Julian, Teresa; Mckenry, Patrick; Mckelvey, Mary. “Cultural Variations in Parenting:             Perceptions of Caucasian, African-American, Hispanic, and Asian-American             Parents.” Family Relations: Interdisciplinary Journal of Applied Family Studies.             Vol. 43. No. 1 (1994): 30-37. January 1994. Web. 24 February 2011

Marsiglia, Cheryl; Walczyk, Jeffrey; Buboltz, Walter; Griffith-Ross, Diana. “Impact of             Parenting Styles and Locus of Control on Emerging Adults’ Psychological             Success.” Journal of Education and Human Development. Vol. 1. Issue 1             (2007): N. Pag. 2007. Web. 1 March 2011.